Thursday, October 31, 2013

Seasons of the Proverbs 31 Woman

I've had this picture in my head for the last six months. It's a woman, and she's walking through a wheat field - breeze blowing, gauzy white cotton dress flowing. I saw her in my dreams, and I longed to be her.


Little did I know - she was longing to be me too.  

My life has been one crazy cycle of gathering and sloughing. Gathering something... and then years later, that whatever it is, is broken... shattered... sloughed. When I was in my 20's, and even early 30's, I gathered degrees. First one. Then another. And another. I gathered them like a child grabs up handfuls of m&ms. Not because they were necessary,
but because it would "help". Help make more money, help distinguish me in a field of 100 other candidates. Granted, they have earned me as much money as I spent on them, and provided for my family. But if I had it to do over, I would have shattered that stereotype that says I have to have so many degrees for things that are good for everyone else... and kept the one degree that was meant for me.  

When I became a homeowner, I gathered things -  expensive furniture that has since been sold because it didn't fit in new homesteads as well. Decor that once sat atop a fireplace mantle we no longer have. "Things" that promised to organize my life, make me thinner, make me smarter, or renew youthful skin.  Now I look at these things... in my closet, on the bookshelf, in my bathroom drawer, and I'm ready to slough again. The home we have now is the smallest square footage per person that we've ever had, but to be honest, who really needs more? You can live in a large home, or a small home, as long as the people inside spend time with each other IN the home, that's all that matters. Now we're simplifying - repurposing, and buying off local garage sale sites. Not because we have to, but because it's just simpler. And simple is good.

I've gathered jobs - at one point amassing five at one time... not including parenting and spousing. And guess what? It's time for some sloughing. You see, I told myself that the Virtuous Woman did it - she had all these jobs, and she was an amazing woman. But here's the thing - she didn't do all of those things at the same time. 

She did them in seasons. But don't take my word for it. Read for yourself in Proverbs 31:

10 A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. 11 Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. 12 She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. 13 She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. 15 She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls. 16 She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. 17 She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. 18 She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. 19 In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. 20 She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. 21 When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 22 She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple. 23 Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. 25 She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. 26 She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 27 She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. 28 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 29 "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all." 30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 31 Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

She works in several seasons to save the money to purchase a field. Later, in another season, she plants a vineyard. A year later, she harvests it. In another season, it's snowing, so she's providing warm clothing for her family. She's started as a wife, and through the seasons, her children are born, they grow, and call her blessed, meaning they must be old enough to understand what it means to be blessed - what is that, 40 seasons?  Yet we get so intimidated by this ONE woman, thinking we must do all that she does, allowing ourselves just one season to do it! 

Ladies, don't give in to that insanity! 

It's just a ploy by satan to confuse us! Just as he can use idle hands as a tool, he can also use hands that are overly busy to destroy a family, as we neglect our children, our spouses, or our homes. It's time for sloughing. Who's with me?

I'm back to that woman walking through the wheat. It's as if I started through the field wearing a backpack, arms laden down, and sporting four layers of clothing on my journey. I drop off the backpack and let go of one job. I can move my shoulders now, and have a free hand to grasp the hand of my baby girl. I realize the two dance classes I signed up for as personal recreation are fun, but the three I started with are just greedy, and so I drop one of those - save it for another season, maybe. 

Maybe not. 

Now I have another free hand to grasp the hand of my son. I gracefully walk away from a relationship with a "friend" who claims to be encouraging, but makes me feel "less than" every time I speak to her. Just like that, I've lost a layer of clothing, and I can stand straighter. I unlock the door to a skeleton in the closet and tell satan that skeleton has no hold on me any more. Two layers. Sloughed. Not having such a full schedule frees me up to start cooking at home again, instead of eating out every day, which recaptured the heart of my husband and prompted him to say the other day "Son, you'll never find a woman that cooks as well as your mama." He never said that about the woman handing him the nuggets in the drive through window for the past year. Boom. Last layer gone. 

And there she is - that woman in the wheat field. She is free from the burdens she took on unnecessarily. She is happy, and her children will rise up and call her blessed... instead of rising up to call her busy. Ready to take on a new season - one of simple pleasures, cutting back, smiles, laughter, and being happy exactly where we are. It's okay to let something go if it frees you up to be the woman God is calling you to be. It's okay to pray about asking God if something belongs in THIS season, if it belongs to another season... or if it's to be one of your seasons at all.  

~ She is free... to slough.


Karen


Photo courtesy of Kaci Staggs Photography. 

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